Journal For The Heart

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Decisions... Decisions...

I have been wandering and wondering for the longest time about migrating to other portals. I apologise for the disappearing acts lately. Its just that once we expose ourselves online, we lose a bit of our privacy. I caught someone taking Tim's pictures today using her mobile. It annoys me but hey! Aren't i posting pictures online? Gosh! It has come to a point that i worry about the safety of my family. The information sharing online reaches people whom you may not know as well. Perhaps, someone, somewhere, whom you do not know, is gossipping about you and judging you? Downloading your pics etc... I wonder if Mothers here have the same viewpoint.

We started out this blog for our own consumption; to keep a diary and precious memories for little Tim... guess i got a little too paranoid that i have to take the whole blog down. Even now, i am not keen to write too much... :( I really do not know how to put my thoughts down... so i kept drifting about till now.

I do wonder if there are still some lurkers around after i took the site down for like 2 months or so. And perhaps, for the last time, if you do want to read our story, i would appreciate if you could leave us a note, tell us a bit about yourself and we may continue the 'read-lationship' :P

Blogicide is not fun... i dont want to go there... therefore, if this place is not to be, i would be locking up my entries somewhere else *shrugs*

Thursday, February 16, 2006



Look! My Birthday Present!

Baby!



Baby! Baby!

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Seize The Day



When I am the only child... i get all the attention :)

Saturday, January 14, 2006

23rd Month Update

Yeah... so much for the lack of update. I was wondering if i should do a 'bumper' issue of the monthly update this time... so sorry, Tim :( Now i have to try to remember what happened the past two months...

I guess the fastest thing that Tim picked up are words. I shall consolidate the list for his 2nd birthday but meanwhile, these are some new words that he picked up and he is able to coin a couple of words together and use short sentences.

Oh no! What Happened?
More again!
Mummy hide.
Mummy run! Chase...
Lolly please
Hungry - He said it today! Perhaps he did earlier... but it was very clearly articulated at dinner.

There are also words that he had been using for sometime but still sounds a bit gibberish, like the word, 'Balloon - ner noon'. Tim usually wakes up in the morning, and pull me up from bed ( if i am sleeping next to him ) and says, Hand... come... dou nai! He will drag me to the service balcony where our fridge is and wait. Usually wailing if i don't response immediately. He is very good at telling us what he wants when he can point and tell the object... else, when we cannot understand him, he would be in tears very quickly.

Tim could also sing some songs and do the movements now. Well... can't really articulate very well for the entire song but good enough for me. Now he sings to Twinkle Twinkle Little Stars, If You're Happy. Sometimes i will catch him singing alone and he does the movements as well... its great fun just watching him.

There are some 'new found' abilities that he displays;

He is able to open closed doors, tippy toeing to reach the hinge and pulling it down, then prying the side open and makes his escape out of the room. Sometimes, i had to lock him in so that he wouldn't wander out when we are having our night time rituals... or when we need time out.

Tim finally got to climb up our bed since he is tall enough now. He loves the feel of our satin sheets and our pillows.and wouldn't want to get down the bed. He also started climbing up the dining chairs and Troy's swivel chair in the computer room. He does that sometimes when he needs to retrieve some lollies to satisfy his sweet tooth. ( Yes... he has 4 at the moment :P) Oh yes... he climbs the green ikea table we got him on his 22nd month as well... We cannot leave the window of which the toddler furnitures are at now. ( no grills installed but he climbs the front door grilles and doesn't really know how to get down if he is too far up... sometimes he wants to jump down... that would be scary!) It has come to our attention that it is no longer safe to leave him alone even for a split second. He acts too fast for our comfort. Very scary sometimes :[

I have been feeding him his regular meals for quite some time now. I seem to be able to do a faster job than Troy though.... :/ He would have cereal in the morning, rice/congee for lunch and dinner and if he is hungry again, or if i felt he hadn't had enough, it would be cereal again before bedtime. It is so far so good, Mum has been helping me to do some cooking for variety. i must say as he has put on some weight. I might have to start changing what i feed him as he was spitting out his food many times during meals and it is very frustrating. Yeah... i have to properly train him on how to self feed.... meanwhile, let me adjust my meal plans first.

We have been so busy with our own stuff that we had neglected Tim's social life. We hardly bring him out anymore or wander to the park downstairs. Tim seems to interact well with adults but are usually very shy with children... especially girls! Strangely, we have this picture book that i would always get Tim to point and tell me the objects and he is always fascinated by the little girl's picture! Hmmm...

Speaking of girls, I had been telling Tim that there is a baby in my tummy and sometimes he would speak of it as well, he would wander over to me and rub my tummy, lie on it and muck around sometimes. Yes, i am still wondering if he really understand what is happening around him.

He had been sticky and nursing a lot more than usual... or perhaps he is really dry nursing and want to suckle more. I love the bond. Its amazing that a 23 month old still want me! wow... And he knows how to share now, he would bring Elmo or other toys and get me to nurse them, sometimes sharing with Troy as well :P His latest favourite place to nurse is his tent. He would ask me to hide inside, when i lie down, he wanders in and started nursing. Nursing is a love/hate relationship though... I get massive tits, infections, yet having to bond with the little one is just so neat! ... till one day i contemplate on weaning ( not yet as i intend to have him self wean ) ... and if he really did! I would be lost and devastated.... catch 22... really.

On potty training... i think he is suffering a regression now as he started pooing in his nappy. He could communicate his needs but sometimes it might just be a little too late. He still 'pees on demand' when we put him on a potty... which is good. Recently, maybe due to excessive liquid intake before bedtime, he wets his nappy, clothes, as well as his beddings! I hope to quickly potty train him so we could save on all that hassle and save some money on nappies... gee... what am i talking about... i have to get a smaller size for the newborn soon.

We are actually contemplating on sending him for playschool. We used to join a playgroup started by Huileng but i haven't been able to make it due to work as well as the distance for travel. Have to discuss this with Troy again. The last thing i want for Tim is for him to be a recluse... Its not fun!

Tim can entertain himself very well as he sits around at his table or in the cot. Boys are just boys! Sometimes he starts to throw things around or stack up some blocks and destorys them if they are not to his standards. Ah... thats the trait of Troy! Perfectionist! But overall, Tim is a very patient person... just like Troy when he is in the working mode. Tim doddles all over the place now. We just can't leave him alone with any writing instruments.. We see him leaving his paw marks on the floor, the drawers, walls, tables, back of chairs... you name it!. but is really interesting to see him draw and let him tell you what he is drawing. Tim is good with names of shapes but still working on names of colours. The latest craze is the diamond shape - shape of the kite.

His memory is superb when he was watching his vcds. He would anticipate the next thing that is coming up and would mimick what the character is doing, like falling down! He would pose his cleopatra pose and wait for the scene to be over.

Although he still wants to be carried around, he wouldn't hesitate to grab my finger/s and roam about. He loves the slopes now! Sometimes its just fun to see him running around and throwing his hands about. Should fix up the video camera soon and take a few shots of it before he outgrows this stage.

Time really pass so quickly! In a month's time, Tim will turn two. I intend to make him another birthday cake and this time, he could help me decorate it :) In two months time, we will welcome our new addition to the family. Hopefully all these transition will not cause Tim to be insecure... i know its going to be tough for all of us... but if God is for us, who can be against us? Amen!

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Sleepy Mummy

The past few nights... and nap times are a constant struggle for Tim and i. I guess today is the third day in a row. Tim doesn't get to sleep that easily anymore and he would cry his heart out whilst closing his eyes, tossing around and getting up at the same time. He would want to nurse constantly and i think i felt contraction many times when he nurses for an extended period of time.

It gets pretty frustrating as i have to try to calm him down, nurse whilst lying down and still couldn't get him to tell me what he wants or why he is feeling uncomfortable. I got really upset and spanked his right thigh and he kept on sobbing... *sigh* okay... that really didn't help. at all... I feel so lousy after doing that. Sometimes, when i wander off for time-out... he would follow me around.... still crying his heart out.

*sigh*... here he goes again....

(After 5 mins)

You see what i mean? He kept waking up, wailing non stop and theres nothing much i can do but pat him back to sleep. Nursing can be very painful now and scary as i am feeling contraction when i nurse him for too long.

I really hope that this is a phase... it could be attributed to many things- having too much activity during the day, tummy ache, hunger, insecurity, rash, discomfort, thirst.... *sigh* these are the few things that i can think of... and i try my best to maintain my cool. Having to wander to and fro his room and ours is not fun when you are called in so many times in the night. I tried to nap with him this afternoon... same thing happened within 45 min of sleep... I suspected gut pain. Rubbed his tummy with oil and he fell asleep almost immediately. When he finally did it again after 2 hours of sleep... i gave up trying. Troy wandered to the room, gave Tim a cuddle and all is well... Charming.... i wonder how Troy does that. Tim used to be able to sleep from half past 1 to about half past 4... and i love to have that 3 good hours to have some 'me' time... seems like he is growing out of it :?

It scares me to anticipate what would it be like when both kids cry at the same time and wanting attention... :( Especially when we want to room them in together.

Sunday, January 01, 2006

Brand New Start!



Its a delightful way to start the year as Tim finally tipped the 11 kg mark! Yippie! :P I am so happy that he is gaining weight.... He even has a small tummy now :D I weigh around 66.4 kg... gained about 15 kg since being pregnant... and 10 weeks or so to go! Hopefully won't gain so much. ( I gained 17 when i had Tim) Troy weighs 68.6 kg...lost weight as he wasn't feeling that great now with all that fatigue and sore throat from partying the past few days. So its a weight gain year for the boys and weight loss for me after i deliver. Easy resolution for the new year! *ponder* Might seriously think about some resolution :)

What is your new year resolution?

Sunday, August 21, 2005

First Hair Cut - Too Many Times

I was meaning to let Tim have his first haircut on his 18th month birthday... Troy couldn't wait. Mum being chinese... she reckons that its not ideal to have Tims hair clipped on the seventh lunar month. Ha! Troy clipped Tims hair on the very first day of the seveth month! That wasn't all... apparently, he didn't finish the job... so he clipped Tim's hair again one evening when i was out for appointment... that was on the 11th if i am not wrong... didn't finish the job again. ( Tim was already asleep when i came home... i didn't know about the haircut till much later. )Tim's hair was rough and fraying ... just messy if you ask me. I miss all that soft curls.

I think it took Troy around 3 times and Mum, twice and finally completing the job this morning. Tim was more curious and not fussing at all. Troy had explained to him about having a haircut and Tim had the chance of looking Troy getting his hair cut last month. Tim kept saying 'cut...cut'...

I was hoping to collect his hair and keeping it in the time capsule that i am making now... *sigh* all i got was a tiny amount of curls :( Sometimes, you just can't let the man do the job... especially when they didn't ask you 'for permission'. When i asked about Tim's hair, Troy told me that its already in the bin... and thrown out! :((((